How To Approach Women During the Day—Everything You Need To Know

Do you want to learn how to approach women during the day? You might feel you lack the confidence, or you don't know what to say, or you're afraid of getting rejected.

If that sounds like you, then you're in luck. 

This is our guide to approaching women in the daytime. You're about to learn what to say to a girl to start a conversation and how to get her number in a few minutes or less.

Trust me—this works. I met my wife during a daytime approach. And since then, I've taught hundreds of men how to do the same.

You're about to learn:

  • Why you should approach girls during the day (Like me, you might find “the one” that way!)
  • How to approach a woman directly without beating around the bush
  • Some best practices to follow (So you'll still get numbers even if you make some mistakes)

With the lessons you'll learn in this guide, approaching women will become natural. Your dating life will never be boring again.

First, let's talk about the most important part of the equation: your motivation.

Why You Should Approach Women During the Day

There are two important reasons. First, women are much more receptive and open to meeting guys like you in the daytime. In fact, for most ladies, getting a compliment from a friendly stranger like you will be a high point in their day.

Secondly, imagine if you sat around waiting for women to approach you. You'll probably be waiting forever. It just won’t happen.

Here are just a few ways your life will change when you learn how to meet women during the day:

  • People will know you as “that confident guy” who's great with women. To women, confidence is more attractive than either looks or money
  • You'll learn how to make women feel completely at ease (Getting their number will be ten times easier)
  • Quickly spot the women who aren't worth your time (You’ll avoid boring dates and difficult relationships)
  • You'll learn how to give a woman an emotional high (She’ll want that high again, which means she’ll be thinking about you)
  • You'll master starting conversations with women without lame pickup lines (Chatting with attractive women will be second-nature to you)
  • You'll never feel bothered by rejections again (And you’ll end up achieving much more in love and life)

Few things build your confidence and skill with women than going out and approaching them. And you're about to learn how.

Before we jump into the good stuff, learn these five important rules first.

The Five Rules of Approaching Women During the Day

Following these rules will make your approach a positive experience for her, too.

Here's why that's important: When you follow these five rules, women will see your approach as the highlight of their day. When you don’t, they might find you creepy or stalker-ish—and that’s the last thing we want to happen.

Keep these in mind:

  • Rule #1: Make your approach relevant to the situation: Whether you compliment her, ask her a question, or do a cold read, your approach must have a good reason. Otherwise, it'll feel out of place, and she'll think you're trying to “pick her up”—and so she’ll feel skeptical and wary.
  • Rule #2: Keep it short and sweet: Your conversation with her should only last 1-5 minutes. The longer the chat lasts, the more likely she’ll get bored, feel uncomfortable, or lose interest—and the higher the chances you won’t get her number.
  • Rule #3: Maintain a distance to begin the approach: Keep her just out of your arm’s reach. Women don’t like it when a stranger enters their personal bubble.
  • Rule #4: Don’t follow her: If she looks at you but doesn’t stop moving, let her go. When she feels like you’re chasing her, she’ll have zero interest in hearing what you have to say.
  • Rule #5: Don’t block her path: When she feels threatened, she’ll be defensive, and that means she’ll be in no mood to talk with you. (You’ll learn the right way to approach her in the next section.)

If you follow these rules, she won’t feel uptight when you approach her. Instead, she’ll feel curious, and that’s a mood conducive to conversation.

Now that you're oriented with the rules, let's jump right into the action.

How to Approach Women in the Daytime

There are two main ways to approach women: directly and indirectly. When approaching them during the day, it's best to use the direct method in most cases.

Why? Simple. Women you meet during the day are busy. And the quicker and more direct your approach is, the more likely you'll get a "yes" before she calls it and leaves you.

Here are some pointers when approaching a woman directly:

  • Focus on your attraction for her: This will kick in your instincts, and instincts are a powerful motivator. This will help overcome your approach anxiety. 
  • Approach right away: After you spot her, approach her within 5 seconds. The longer you wait, the faster your confidence will evaporate.
  • Approach her from the side: Avoid approaching from directly behind her because it could scare her. Even if you’re walking up from behind, come up parallel to her before getting her attention. 
  • Compliment and introduce: It's hard to go wrong with something like: "Hi, I just saw you walk by, and I had to run over to say ‘hi,’ because I thought you looked nice.”
  • Smile and make eye contact throughout your interaction: This will help make a connection with her.
  • Keep things positive: You're not picking her up—you're checking to see if she's worth spending more time with. Be friendly, have some small talk, make her laugh, and get her number—that's it.

The key is to approach her right away, introduce yourself, have a quick and lively chat, and then get her number.

That leads us to the obvious next question. In the 1-5 minutes you have with her, what should you talk about?

What to Talk About With a Girl You Just Approached

Normally, small talk is fine—as long as you don’t bounce from one topic to another, going in no particular direction. Remember: You’re leading the conversation, and that means you’re taking it somewhere.

Here are a few pointers to having a good conversation:

  • Small talk questions like “What do you do for a living?” are great for starting conversations, but only if you follow up with deeper questions like: “How did you get into that job?” or “Why did you choose that line of work?”
  • The key is to make her share something meaningful and personal to you, and deep follow-up questions do exactly that. The more she tells you about herself, the more trust and chemistry she’ll feel towards you.
  • Follow the 60/40 rule–that is, she should be the one talking for at least 60% of the time. That way, you maximize your chances of making a real connection with her.

Now, here’s a big one: What about awkward silences? What should you do when you run out of things to talk about?

First, I’d suggest you stop calling it an “awkward” silence, because that just feeds your insecurity. Instead, it’s just a silence that you can (and should) use to build her attraction to you.

Here’s why: silence is an opportunity to build sexual tension. And if you like her so far, sexual tension is a great thing to have.

Simply look into her eyes without saying anything—just a smile or smirk on your face—she’ll feel the urge to break the tension, which she’ll do by smiling back and blurting something out, like “What?

And that’s when you can say something like: “Nothing, I think you’ve got some interesting stories to tell me. What’s your number? We should talk again soon.”

That’s how you can use uncomfortable situations—like a few seconds of silence—to your advantage.

Now, let’s tackle the next big question: What if she’s not interested? The answer to that question rolls into the next topic we’ll cover in this guide:

How to End a Conversation With a Girl You Approached

Remember the 1–5-minute time limit we’re working with? It’s important because if a conversation goes any longer, it can get stale. She’ll start feeling uncomfortable, and she’ll want to get away from you—even if she likes you.

It’s like how you feel when someone drones on and on about their hobby that you’re absolutely not interested in. You might like the person, but it doesn’t change the fact that you want to check out of the conversation.

So, here’s my advice: know when to call it. Here are some signs she’s no longer interested, and what to do next:

  • She’s giving one-syllable answers or won’t give her name: Tell her: “Hey, no worries. Nice to meet you,” and move on with the rest of your day.
  • The conversation’s slowing down: Before it dies, end it by saying: “Hey, we should have coffee sometime.” If she says “Yes”, then you can say, “Great, what’s your number?”
  • She’s looking distracted or uncomfortable: End the conversation early the same way as explained above.

The formula for ending a conversation goes something along the lines of:

“Nice to meet you. Let’s talk sometime. What’s your number?”

And if she declines, it’s fine—thank her anyway and move right on.

Now, to wrap up, let’s talk about a few best practices that will increase your daytime approaching success rate...

Best Practices When Approaching Women During the Day

Everything works better when you’re confident and skilled. You’ll approach more women, you’ll get more numbers, and you’ll enjoy more dates.

Getting better at approaching women takes practice. The tips you’ll learn in this section will shorten the learning curve. You’ll start getting more numbers in no time.

Here are some best practices for daytime direct approaching:

  • Show the palms of your hands when you talk, gesture, or offer a handshake. It’s a psychological trick—it makes people trust you more, even if they’re meeting you for the first time.
  • Avoid awkward topics like politics, religion, and sex. Instead, stick to the topic of “her”. Learn about her, what drives her, and what she’s interested in. 
  • Build confidence: Have conversations with baristas, sales ladies, and women you’re not attracted to. With all of this practice, soon approaching women and talking to them will feel natural to you.
  • Accept rejections: If you don’t get her number, or if she’s not interested in you, that’s fine. So, take it easy, wish her a good day, and move on.

The right mindset is this: you’re checking to see if she’s as interesting as she looks. If she is, and if she gives you her number, great! If not, then no worries—you won’t miss anything. There are thousands of other attractive women out there to meet.

Summary

In this guide, you learned:

  • Why you should approach women during the day (It builds confidence and you might meet your future partner that way)
  • The five rules of approaching women during the day
    • Rule #1: Make your approach relevant to the situation (You want to say hi and have a short conversation)
    • Rule #2: Keep it short and sweet: 1-5 minutes tops
    • Rule #3: Maintain a distance to begin the approach (Stay out of her bubble)
    • Rule #4: Don’t follow her if she’s clearly not interested
    • Rule #5: Don’t block her path
  • How to approach women in the daytime
    • Focus on your attraction to her (Let your instincts kick in)
    • Approach right away
    • Approach from the side
    • Compliment and introduce yourself
    • Smile and make eye contact
    • Keep a positive vibe all throughout
  • What to talk about with a girl you just approached
    • Lead the conversation towards making a connection with her
    • Start out with a harmless question, then go deeper with your follow-up questions
    • Make her share personal and meaningful things with you
    • Follow the 60/40 rule. Let her do most of the talking.
    • Don’t break the tension when a period of silence creeps in. Smile, look her in the eyes, and let her break the tension if she wants to
  • How to end the conversation in a good way
    • If she’s not interested, say “No worries,” wish her a good day, and move on.
    • Otherwise, suggest talking again soon or meeting up sometime. If she says “yes,” ask for her number.
  • Some best practices to shorten your learning curve and maximize your success rate
    • Show the palms of your hands
    • Avoid awkward topics
    • Build confidence by having conversations with baristas, sales ladies, and other women you’re not particularly attracted to
    • Accept rejections and take it easy when they happen

Did I miss anything? Do you want me to cover something that wasn’t included in this guide? Let me know in the comments section below.

How To Approach Women During the Day

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