How To Approach A Woman At The Library (5 Ways To Ask Her Out)

Maybe you're a bookworm, so you're at the library or the bookstore a lot.

You've noticed there's a lot of really attractive women there, and now you're wondering how to approach a woman at the library.

And a lot more. Let's jump into it.

How To Approach A Woman At The Library When You're Studying

The library is a very quiet environment. You're not going to want to go in gangbusters and be really loud and attract a lot of attention.

It's not going to be good for your approach. It's not going to be good for you probably, and definitely not for her.

Women also get self-conscious when attention goes their way. So, a casual approach is really the best way to go when you want to talk to somebody at the library.

But how can you start a casual conversation at the library with a really attractive woman and walk away with her number?

Well, here are some steps to approach a woman at the library while you're studying:

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#1. Sit By Her

You don't want to be at a far distance and looking across the room at her.

Go sit somewhere that's close to her, somewhere you're able to talk to her easily. It can even be right beside her.

Especially if all the other seats are taken and there's one seat open right beside her. Don't be shy, go sit right there.

#2. Make A Comment Or Ask A Question

When there's an opportunity, like she's taking a break and she's not looking down at her book, you can ask her what she is studying.

Especially if she has a big pile of papers there. You could be like: "That looks like a heavy read. What are you studying?"

The other thing I like to do too, and this works at a coffee shop as well, is when you see someone studying, very often if they've been studying all day.

They'll stop, take a break, and they'll grab their neck. That's an indication of fatigue. They've been looking at their books all day and hunched over.

In that case, you can make an observation: "Long day studying?" Or something like that.

Very often in those situations, they're very happy to talk to someone when they haven't talked to anyone all day.

They're just looking at their books and they're mentally heavy reads, trying to get through their exams or whatever they're doing, and they're happy to take a break and talk to somebody.

So, make a comment and be confident that you're going to be the perfect opportunity for her to have a conversation.

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#3. Pay Attention To Her Reaction

If she seems chatty, then that's great, you can keep going.

You can ask another question, or follow up, or give your opinion on the topic she's studying. It doesn't matter.

But, if she's very quick to the point, not super chatty and gets right back down to her reading or a book or whatever, then just leave it at that. It's all good.

You never want to push these conversations. It should be basically frictionless.

It should be very easy when you're talking to her. If she's not really into it, then don't force it.

#4. Learn About Her

You're talking now, so learn about why she's studying, what she's

studying. What's her purpose, what's her motivation to pick this topic?

That's where you're going to learn the real details, the juice to her, what kind of person she is, what motivates her. That's going to help you get to know her.

When people share meaningful things about themselves, it helps to create a connection.

#5. Ask Her Out

You're about to leave and you want to ask her out, just say, "Hey, I gotta get going, but let's have a coffee sometime". Put it on the table.

If she's not into it or she hesitates like, "Oh, I don't know", just be like, "Oh, that's cool, you have a good day", and excuse yourself.

But if she says yes, then obviously at this point ask for her number.

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Steps To Approach A Woman At The Library (Summary)

Here's the summary to the steps to approach a woman at the library while you're studying:

1. Sit by her: don't be shy, sit somewhere that's close to her so you're able to talk to her easily
2. Make a comment or ask a question: find an opportunity to talk to her and say something like: "That looks like a heavy read. What are you studying?" or "Long day studying?"
3. Pay attention to her reaction: if she's not really into the conversation, then don't force it
4. Learn about her: when people share meaningful things about themselves, it helps to create a connection
5. Ask her out: you can say "Hey, I've got to get going, but let's have a coffee sometime"

If you want to learn how to do other kinds of approaches and how to do direct approaches, check out this post. 

And if you have any comments or questions, leave them below.

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