Relationships are exciting and challenging. They’re everything that's so magical about life, which is why we’ve gathered together a list of the 10 best books on relationships right now.
The thing with relationships is they are like a stormy sea at times. And without a captain and a good ship, navigating that sea can be tricky. There’s thunder, there’s lightning. But when things are calm, the love shines through again.
If you’re at a point in your relationship where you’re feeling a little unsure of things, or if you feel ready for a relationship but you’re not sure how to start one, turning to the expert advice of professionals who know what they’re talking about is always a smart idea.
This is why we’ve created this list of the 10 best books on relationships that are available right now. These books will help you communicate better, strengthen your bonds, feel that warm, loved-up feeling more often - and take your relationship and life to the next level.
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Choose your favorite titles below:
Relationship Goals: How To Win at Dating, Marriage and Sex is a bestseller written by Michael Todd, a lead pastor and family man who previously penned Crazy Faith.
His latest book seeks to help people do two things: Find love. And maintain love.
The clue is in the name: Relationship Goals: How To Win at Dating, Marriage and Sex connects with you wherever you are at in your life and relationship, and shows you how to set goals, overcome the biggest obstacles relationships present, and transition from dating to relationships to marriage - while having great sex along the way.
There’s definitely a religious slant to this one, as Michael Todd comes from a place of faith and worship. But if you can get over that, or if you dig that, this relationship book is as good as any when it comes to helping you nurture true love.
Healthy Relationships is another best selling relationship book, this time from author and therapist Rachel Chapman. It was released during the height of the pandemic in the summer of 2020, and would prove to be a timely addition to the bookshelf of couples who were experiencing difficulties during the first quarantine.
Rachel Chapman defines for us what a healthy relationship is - what it’s supposed to look like, feel like, not just for you but for your partner, too.
Chapman then offers practical advice that will help you achieve a healthier relationship, teaching you the art (and joy) of listening, sharing, compromising and not going on the offensive all the time.
Much of the book works in a step-by-step format, which makes for easy reading. The author is also at pains to point out what an unhealthy relationship looks like (passive-aggressive behavior etc), and while some of it may hit hard with some readers at first, the purpose of the book is to illuminate, inspire and help you improve your relationship.
Communication and Relationships by life coach Roberto Vingelli is aimed at helping you communicate better in your relationship.
But it’s more than just another relationship book. While it will certainly help you express your feelings better, open up more and create a stronger connection with your partner, the lessons learned in this book can be applied to various areas of your life, including your friendships and work.
For example, Vingelli explains how communication is the foundation of love, and that love - and a happier relationship - is the true foundation of a happier life overall.
Who’s the book for ultimately?
It’s for anyone who’s often heard it said that they’re not the best communicator in a relationship. It’s for anyone who’s tired of misunderstandings being blown out of proportion, or who’s fed up with trying to open up to their partner, only to be met with a brick wall. If you want to open your heart and let someone into it, this book might be for you.
Whole Again by author and co-founder of PsychoPathFree Jackson MacKenzie is for anyone who’s suffered in a relationship at the hands of an emotional abuser, and who so far hasn’t made it out the other side.
Following on from MacKenzie’s previous book, Psychopath Free, Whole Again is filled with strategies that help you heal, grow and move on from a toxic relationship so that you’re ready to meet someone new, let them into your life - and experience true love.
That said, this book will only help you if you’re now in a position where you’re ready to help yourself. If you recognize you were in a toxic relationship, and if you’re ready to accept help, Whole Again can be a genuinely comforting read that’s sprinkled with honesty, openness, transparency and guidance.
Nobody likes to be told that they’re too “needy.” Worse still, nobody likes to be told that they’re obsessed with someone else.
Addiction to Love was written by Susan Peabody, a self-confessed “love addict,” - an unflattering term for anyone who becomes so dependent on the need for a relationship that they’ll persist even when it’s clear the relationship is a complete dead-end.
If this sounds like you, or if you’ve always struggled to assert your independence once you enter into a relationship, Addiction to Love might be the tonic you need. The book highlights what codependency is, it points out just how detrimental it is, and it will help you free yourself from the addictive need for a relationship so that you’re able to love yourself and nurture relationships the right way.
That said, Addiction to Love can be just as good at disentangling you from a partner who’s showing obsessive traits towards you. If you feel as though you’re in a codependent relationship but you’re not sure, Susan Peabody gives numerous examples to demonstrate what relationship addiction looks like so that you can spot the behavior, either from yourself or from others.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work was penned by Dr. John Gottman, a professor of psychology who founded the Seattle Marital and Family Institute.
As per its title, this relationship book is aimed at married couples who are currently navigating a tricky period in their marriage. But while some relationship books try to fix the “couple,” this book is more aimed at fixing you (while your partner fixes themselves in the meantime - if necessary).
The basic premise of the book is that some marriages are successful, and others aren’t. But just like successful marriages can one day fall apart, rockier marriages can also be saved - but only if both spouses are prepared to work on themselves.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work arms you both with the tools needed to overcome all solvable problems that all marriages encounter at some point or another. And even if a problem seems insurmountable right now? This book might just show you that even that issue can be dealt with.
We’ve all been there: We want to express ourselves to our partner, but we haven’t yet mastered the art of communication in a relationship. As such, each time we raise an issue, we somehow manage to start a huge fight. There are tears, tantrums - and we end up sleeping in the spare room, brooding over the argument we just had.
It’s an exhausting, repetitive cycle.
Communicate Your Feelings (Without Starting a Fight) is an ideal read for anyone who wants to stay with their partner, but who’s tired of the arguments. You know that arguments are necessary for a relationship (they can help us grow, after all), but you’re fed-up with trying to sort out an issue without things exploding.
Author and psychotherapist Nic Saluppo writes in an easy-to-apply way, helping couples not to avoid confrontation, but to at least start a discussion without the constant worry and dread that things will turn volatile. This book teaches you how to raise issues, how to react when your partner raises issues, and how to approach situations with empathy, confidence - and clarity.
Anxiety in Relationships for Couples by expert in emotional vulnerability Anastasia Kelley, offers a helping hand for anyone who suffers from the constant torment that something is going to go wrong soon in their relationship.
Drawing on her years of experience helping individuals and couples understand and deal with anxiety in relationships, Anastasia Kelley walks you through a range of topics, including understanding why you're anxious and pinpointing your key triggers.
Anxieties covered in this book include the fear that your partner might leave you, feelings of jealousy, as well as overcoming clinginess and neediness.
If any of these topics resonate with you, and if your relationship is suffering as a result of your issues, Anxiety in Relationships is a book written with compassion and understanding.
Are you an over-thinker? Do you feel as though your relationships are always hitting rocky roads because of your negative thoughts?
If so, Relationship OCD might be the self-help relationship book for you. Written by the founder of the Center for Anxiety and OCD, Sheva Rajaee, MFT, this book is designed to help anyone who in the past (or even in the present) has managed to sabotage their relationship(s) via obsessive thinking.
Using a cognitive behavioral approach, Relationship OCD highlights the reasons some of us obsess over things like self-doubt, the future and commitment. It then provides the tools and guidance that will help you overcome your issues, showing you why you think the way you do, how such thinking is impacting your relationship - and what you can do next.
All the advice in this book is extremely transferable, with Sheva Rajaee shrewdly negotiating the many obsessive thoughts that people plagued with ROCD have. Importantly, the author is also adept at writing in such a way that you don’t feel alienated while reading it. Instead, you realize that, yes, you have anxiety and that, yes, your thoughts are scampering your relationships. But you’re also normal - and with the right help, you can work through your issues with your partner.
The Overcoming Jealousy Workbook by award-winning writer and leading expert in dealing with jealousy Zachary Stockill, is a useful addition to the bookshelf of anyone who’s always struggled with jealousy - but who intends to do something about it.
Jealousy is, after all, one of the most destructive traits in a relationship. It pushes people away from us and ruins what could otherwise have been an amazing part of our life.
Drawing on his years of experience as a researcher, Zachary Stockill - who has also worked extensively as a relationship coach - is workbook filled with easy-to-execute exercises that teaches you how to understand why you feel jealous, as well as how to implement psychological techniques that will help you stay present and in control of your thoughts and feelings.
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These are the best 10 books on relationships available to buy in 2022. Some are excellent for helping you communicate with your spouse better, others are ideal for if you’ve got relationship anxiety, and while some can be read alone, others should be shared with your spouse so that you can grow together.
According to relationship experts and authors like Rachel Chapman (Healthy Relationships) and Michael Todd (Relationship Goals), there are many ingredients that make a successful relationship. These include communication, honesty and empathy. However, the number one ingredient needed to make a relationship successful is commitment.
Without full commitment, the other ingredients won’t exist. There’ll be communication - but it won’t be full communication. There’ll be honesty - but there’ll still be secrets. When you go all-in, when you commit 100% to your partner, your cup is filled.
A love language is the way someone expresses love. Your partner might have one love language, and you might have another. It’s really important that you understand the love languages so that you know exactly how your partner expresses their love. This will help you develop empathy, as well as a stronger bond with your loved one. The 7 love languages are as follows:
As well as reading relationship books designed to get your relationship back on track, such as Relationship Goals by Michael Todd, you should also work on yourself first and foremost. Are there things you’re doing wrong? Could you be communicating better? Could you be showing your partner more love? Could you perhaps surprise them more? Or perhaps you haven’t allowed yourself to be vulnerable in front of your partner?
You can also examine your relationship from a distance to see if you can spot points of tension that are causing conflict. For example, maybe you’re spending too much time together and therefore need some time apart … or maybe you’re not spending enough time together and therefore need to arrange more date nights?
It might also be the case that you can spice things up in the bedroom, or maybe it’s the arguments that are causing division. If this is the case, books like Communicate Your Feelings by Nic Saluppo can help.
The best relationship is one in which the two of you commit with all your heart and soul to each other. It’s one in which you mutually understand each other’s love language, as well as everything else. It’s one in which you share values and visions of the future. It’s one in which you get each other and grow together. You lean on each other, support each other and build as One.
There are plenty of helpful relationship books for couples that you can read together with your partner. However, one of the most important is Communicate Your Feelings (Without Starting a Fight) by Nic Saluppo. This book is tailor-made for couples who want to communicate better so that they feel more confident with raising issues in the knowledge that it won’t lead to fighting.
The book will introduce you both to 13 communication techniques that are designed to help you be more helpful and empathetic when approaching what can otherwise be tricky topics and discussions.
Have you read any of these books? Got a favorite? Don’t forget to let us know in the comments below!
Also see: 15 Best Relationship Books For Guys (Sex and Love)┃14 Best Psychology Books About Relationships ┃12 Best Relationship Books for Singles┃12 Best Relationship Books On Audible┃The 10 Best Books on Relationships ┃10 Best Self-Help Books on Relationships and Communication┃10 Best Relationship Books For Couples